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  1. EphamE
  2. Love
  3. Wednesday, August 29 2012, 12:48 AM
I have a very strong feeling that a good friend has the same feelings for me as I do for him, but he has not confirmed with me directly that this is the case. I'm certain that he's afraid to admit it, and I don't know why because I've already told him how I feel. I wish to confront him about it, but I don't know if it will cause some unnecessary drama or whatever. I just don't know what to do. Worst of all, I think he feels like I'm oblivious to him liking me back, simply because of some of the things I choose to do/say.

If I do confront him about it, how will things turn out?

Thanks
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Star_Gazer Accepted Answer Pending Moderation
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Hello EphamE, when I read this I had a strong urge to say, "whoa"! I have been there and done that with my ex, and let me tell you, all it does it give them an "edge". When you allow your feelings to be known and the other person has not yet returned those sentiments, but they give off that vibe to you, it is all part of a "control" deal with them. They know they have you in an emotional state over them, and they use this power to control you and manipulate you. Do you ever feel like you are on the back burner with this person? Do they make plans with you in advance, or is everything "spontaneous". Do you ever catch them lying to you about where they are or who they are with, when you were told something different? If the answer to any of the above questions is "yes" then a game is being played with you. Let this person come to you and chase you. Friend it for a bit. No more sharing your true feelings for them. Actions speak louder than words and your possible mate needs to step it up for you, and show you in an "un-friend" way that they have more intimate feelings for you. They may be one of those who assumes you can guess their feelings without them having to tell you. Intimacy sounds like it is hard for them possibly due to fear of committment or fear of being hurt. There is truth to the saying :if you love something, set it free, if it comes back, it is meant to be." Good luck1 :)
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  1. more than a month ago
  2. Love
  3. # Permalink
EphamE Accepted Answer Pending Moderation
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Actually, thing MAIN problem with all of this is the fact that we're both guys. He's said in the past that he's straight, but a lot of things we've done together point towards the opposite of what he's said.

But the thing is, he's given up saying and doing a lot of things simply because it made me uncomfortable in the past. Sure, he may say some things when we're in a group of friends, but not near as often as he used to. And what's strange is that he's never actually sat down and talked with me to say something along the lines of "Okay, listen. I'm straight. You like me and all, that's cool, but I don't feel the same towards you." An example: friends talking about girls they find attractive amongst one and other. He doesn't do it anymore if I'm there. And if he does, it's usually because I'm saying stuff like that, too. But wouldn't any normal person simply keep going on with what they want, and leave me to deal with whatever problems I have? I know it might sound like some very considerate action by a great friend, but he's broken connections with friends in the past over far less, and actually goes out of his way to talk to these people to settle things first. With me, it's usually silence.
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  1. more than a month ago
  2. Love
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