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  1. PKD
  2. General Questions
  3. Sunday, December 29 2013, 04:44 PM
Hello! I am currently married, but my marriage is turbulent and problematic from many years and I think it would not last long. Do you see us divorced in the near future? I want to know will I be unhappy in love all my life? Will I have a man beside me to spend some good and quality years with? If yes - do I know him now or will I meet him later? Tell me about him some more - like age, job, nationality and how we will meet? Will I have a relationship, which will be fulfilling and equal? Will I get a chance in love? Thanks.
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Hello pkd, I am saddened to hear about your marital distress. I have been in your position before and it was stressful to say the least. Both my husband and myself were committed to solving our issues by actually listening to what each other had to say and making changes. Marriage is hard sometimes, like a roller coaster with ups and downs. If both parties are willing to accept responsibility for their role in the issue, listen to the needs and wants of the other party, and work together to change things for the better, a marriage will persevere. If only one party is willing to do the work then it is not fair to them and they deserve to find somebody who will. The next time you speak to your spouse try talking to him without saying things that are accusatory, demanding, insulting, or irrational. Tell him how things make you feel and what you need or want to make you feel better. He's more likely to respond favorably when he does not feel "attacked. If you express your needs to him ,make them seem like suggestions to him that he can take to heart so when he does them, he feels like they were his idea. This is because he is choosing to do something you want, not being ordered to do it. It seems like a game, but it is not. It is a positive approach to one of the sources of consternation in a marriage. It actually works for me and my husband is none the wiser. Remember that actions speak louder than words too. A man can say he wants to marry a woman for years. Until she gets a ring and sets a date, he's just offering lip service. I say these things to you because I feel strongly that you and he are connected spiritually and it is a strong connection. There is a heaviness and cloud of negativity hanging over the both of you. You both need to let go of the hurt and the bad so you and reconnect and remember what made you love each other in the first place. Too often does comfortability play a role in these situations. I feel things will work out for you and your spouse with a little regrouping. I wish you the best!:D
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